I live in NJ with my single mom and she is Hungarian and so am I but I was born and the United States. All of my family members live in Hungary and even my father which my mom divorced. I just feel no reason to live in America when we have nobody there and I just feel so lonely. Right now I'm here in Hungary visiting my family and my mom is in America working her butt off. She has been here in America for 20 years and she has suffered a lot here. She wants to put me in a Adventist school which is called Uchee Pines and the thing that I don't like about that school is that you can't wear pants or short sleeves!! Isn't that insane!! I'll be going back to my mom in November 15 but I want to stay here in Hungary. It feels so much better here since there's transportation not like in America where you have to have a car to get around. I cry every night and I can't sleep because of that Uchee Pines school and also knowing that I'll be going back to America since I don't know when I'll see my family again. The airline ticket is very expensive so I only get to see my family once a year but my mom haven't seen them in like 4 years! I feel so sorry for my mom since she can't even afford an apartment and we're sharing a house with a lady and I don't like it. I've been home schooled and I already finished high school and I don't know what to do! I'm always alone at home!! I hate my mom for not putting me in normal school!!! Please help me!! I don't know what to do with my life!! I think about suicide cuz I don't live for anything.
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1 :
It sounds like your Mom really needs you. She must really miss you by now. It sounds like she is going through a lot to care for you, very unselfishly. I don't think it is so bad for a school to care about what you wear, at least they care. Once you make a friend or two, things will be much better.
2 :
Talk to your family about this NOW. I am sure your mother intends the best for you by wanting you to live in America and attend a "good" school. It may be scary for you - and limit your freedom, but your mother wants you to grow up a "good" girl with respect for yourself and your family. She is not trying to punish you. If you were home educated it's because your parents thought that was the best education for you and did not trust the school system to bring you up how they wanted, but it can make you feel "outside" from the rest of the children your age. You say your mum is working hard - she is doing it for you. She has not visited family for 4 years but pays for you every year, she has to live in a shared house and work hard to provide for you. At least at school - with all its limitations - you will have friends. You should also talk to your Mom - tell her how you feel - she may get angry, but she will calm down, she does not want to loose you - neither do the rest of your family. Talk to someone you can trust. And talk to them NOW or as soon as possible. They should respect your feelings and be aware of your thoughts on the subject. People do love you. Best wishes.
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